Marriage Counseling Rexburg
Do You Feel Unheard Or Unloved In Your Marriage?
Are you having difficulty communicating and connecting with your partner? Do you feel like he or she doesn’t understand you? Does it seem that things might be easier if you simply got a divorce?
You may be experiencing conflict or distance in your relationship that wasn’t there when you first got married. Perhaps you or your partner has carried habits, beliefs, or hurts from past relationships that make it hard to nurture emotional and physical intimacy. Or, your trust may have been broken by an extramarital affair, and now you feel shocked, betrayed and unsure of whether you even want to heal your relationship!
You may struggle to openly discuss your challenges, goals, and needs as you and/or your partner try to avoid arguments and intimacy issues. Do you wish you could establish healthy, authentic communication with your spouse and foster a more loving and trusting marriage?
Do You Wish to Establish Healthy Communication With Your Spouse?
Foster a more loving and trusting marriage, you have come to the right place: Integrated Counseling and Wellness is a dedicated provider of marriage counseling to Rexburg, ID, couples, helping you identify problem areas in your relationship and take practical steps to heal and strengthen your marriage.
Many Couples Benefit From Marriage Counseling
While the divorce rate in the U.S. hovers around 50 percent, many couples wait for an average of six years after serious problems start before seeking help. There are a variety of issues that couples may face during a marriage, including verbal or emotional abuse, infidelity, domestic violence, and pornography, and/or intimacy issues. Communication challenges and the frequency of conflict in a relationship leave many couples feeling like they are constantly fighting instead of working together on the same team.
Each spouse brings his or her own experiences, challenges and ways of responding to conflict, yet sometimes the strategies you use to avoid arguments can actually make things worse. In an effort to maintain a calm living environment, spouses might avoid discussing uncomfortable issues or withdraw from situations that tend to deteriorate into shouting matches. As a result, exchanges may become cold and impersonal, to the point that you feel like you are living with a roommate instead of a caring spouse. This is where marriage counseling comes in.
Marriage counseling isn’t about placing blame or diving into individual personal issues that don’t relate to your marriage. Rather, the goal is to enhance your relationship so you and your partner both feel heard, understood and loved. At Integrated Counseling and Wellness in Rexburg, Idaho, you can identify problem areas in your relationship and take practical steps to heal and strengthen your marriage.
At Integrated Counseling and Wellness in Rexburg, Idaho, you can identify problem areas in your relationship and take practical steps to heal and strengthen your marriage.
7 Reasons to Consider Marriage Counseling
Marriage counseling has been proven helpful in issues concerning the following:
- Negative communication – Any verbal communication or tone that leads to feelings of insecurity, hurt, or withdrawal.
- One or both partners have had an affair – Rebuilding trust after an affair is only possible if there are willingness and commitment from both spouses to address the problems at hand and move past them. A marriage counselor can help facilitate a productive discussion to develop an amicable solution.
- Partners live like roommates – While doing everything together is not necessary for a happy marriage, simply co-existing may indicate a problem. A relationship that lacks warmth, communication, and/or intimacy may require counseling.
- Difficulties in solving problems – There are times when both spouses are aware of the problem but are unsure of how to effectively fix it. In such cases, you may need a qualified third party to help guide you in the right direction.
- Negative feelings become destructive – Attempting to set aside negative feelings often leads to their surfacing in a spiteful, destructive manner. A professional marriage counselor can help you find other ways to express negative feelings that are more beneficial for the relationship.
- Separation seems like the only solution – Time away from each other may seem like a good idea to help spouses “cool down” after an argument. However, addressing a problem by running away from it usually only inflames the issue even more.
- Staying together for the children’s sake – It may appear wise to maintain the family unit that your children are used to, when in fact most children can sense the problem and become adversely affected by it. This is only beneficial if you are staying together and working towards a brighter future.
Dedicated Marriage Counselling Turning Problems into Solutions
Every couple goes through times where they disagree or face conflict, and the approach I take during marriage counseling will depend on your particular situation. You may wish to pursue counseling for enhancement issues, such as premarital counseling or learning how to communicate better. Alternatively, you may be struggling to deal with issues of infidelity or the potential for divorce. In sessions, I will look at the struggles you and your spouse are facing and how you each interact with the other to create a tailored plan to meet your needs. I provide a safe space and warm, compassionate support so you can share new experiences and regain some of the connection that you feel you have lost.
I pull from a variety of methodologies to help you understand why you are struggling and what you can do to address these issues. By integrating relationship enhancement techniques that have been studied and proven over the past 40 years, I will help you set your own relationship goals. Instead of feeling stuck in opposition with one another, your partner can stand behind your shoulders and experience what you are thinking and feeling, so that you can learn to do the same in return. And, while you are building practical skills and learning how to empathize with your partner in the safety of my office, you can also actively engage in open dialogue while giving and receiving love, compassion, and support.
The skills and lessons you learn during marriage counseling can be applied at home, so you can continue the healing process between sessions. As you begin to understand and feel what your spouse is experiencing, you can more effectively deconstruct the defenses and barriers to communication that exist in your marriage. My goal is for you to get to the point in your relationship where you feel secure, heard and loved, and no longer need my help.
As a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LAMFT), and Licensed Professional Counselors (LCP/LCPC) I have been helping individuals and couples address challenges and concerns in their marriage for many years. I have seen how effective a good therapist can be in helping a couple find healing and growth. In my experience, it is usually possible to build a stronger foundation based on love and trust by learning how to:
- resolve conflict in a safe, healthy manner
- express your needs to your spouse clearly and without resentment
- openly discuss the underlying issues without fear of further harm
- And become acquainted with your spouse and his/her needs once more.
Frequently Asked Questions about Marriage Counseling
You May Be Interested in Marriage Counseling But Still, Have Questions or Concerns…
Is Marriage Counseling Just for Married Couples in Crisis?
Although most couples do not turn to marriage counseling until their differences seem irreconcilable, working with a qualified specialist can be highly beneficial long before you consider giving up. It is common knowledge that two key ingredients to a solid, healthy relationship are communication and commitment. The sooner that spouses learn how to use these ingredients to overcome problems the better off they will be as a coupleship.
What is the Difference Between Marriage Counseling and Couples Counseling?
There is no substantial difference between marriage counseling and couples counseling. However, there are certain exceptions from a cultural or religious standpoint. When it comes to families whose faith is deeply ingrained into their everyday lives, couples often need help not only enhancing their communication, but also in what it means to them to be a spouse and parent, and how to resolve conflict, based on their respective culture.
Is Sex Therapy Different Than Marriage Counseling?
Yes – sex therapy is its own separate discipline with a core focus on physical intimacy and its individual set of challenges that some couples face. However, a qualified marriage counselor is also trained in helping couples resolve physical intimacy issues that stem from the core challenges of their relationship.
If you believe that physical intimacy is your main challenge, marriage counseling can help you determine whether there are any underlying issues to be resolved. Oftentimes, intimacy issues resolve themselves if broken trust or negative communication patterns are dealt with.
How Long Does Marriage Counseling Take to See Real Results?
Studies show that the average number of marriage counseling sessions that it takes to see real results is between 10 and 20, with some couples experiencing positive change quicker than others. As a dedicated professional in the field, I can only give you an estimate of the sessions you and your spouse may need to attend based on the complexity of the issues at hand.
The goal of marriage counseling is quality, not quantity. However, there is significant evidence showing that ending your sessions early leads to results that are not as effective or lasting.
Is Marriage Counseling a Good Idea If I’m Considering Leaving the Relationship?
Although commitment to the relationship is a key prerequisite for marriage counseling, most couples do not seek professional help until they are in crisis and are beginning to question that commitment. I am here to provide the critical support that you need during this difficult time, helping you obtain clarity on the decision at hand. If your relationship is indeed destined to end, I am committed to ensuring that it ends as peacefully as possible.
Is Marriage Counseling Recommended If There Has Been Abuse in My Relationship?
This can be a difficult question to answer without knowing the specifics of the conflict. In cases of one-sided domestic abuse where one spouse is afraid of the other, marriage counseling can cause more harm than good as it brings up the dangerous dynamics of the relationship in counseling sessions. This is where individual counseling is recommended.
What if marriage counseling brings up other issues that we aren’t prepared to address?
You may know that complicated, buried issues need to be addressed during counseling, but that doesn’t make them any less frightening. I create a safe environment and set a careful and flexible pace to help you feel comfortable and supported as you explore challenges in your relationship. I will work with you to integrate new skills and experiences, so that you and your spouse have the ability and confidence to work through each challenge as it comes up. By honestly addressing your issues – even the ones that feel impossible – you can begin to create mutual healing.
What if my spouse doesn’t want to participate in marriage counseling?
While it is ideal to work with you and your partner together, we can pursue one-on-one marriage counseling if your spouse is resistant to or unable to attend sessions. Together, we can develop skills and strategies to help you cope with hardships and begin healing and improving your relationship. Over time, your partner may notice these positive changes and wish to begin attending. However, even if your partner refuses to participate, it is possible to build a stronger and more empathic connection with him/her.
I already have a strong support system – why would I need counseling?
It is extremely helpful to have a strong support system when you are dealing with difficulties in your marriage. The love and care of family, friends, and/or your religious community can give you strength at a time when you feel vulnerable. There is, however, a limit to what this level of support can do for you and your marriage. One of the most powerful steps you can take to heal and strengthen your connection is to build new skills and change unhealthy processes. I provide patient, compassionate support, as well as an objective perspective and practical strategies and techniques needed to improve your relationship.
You Can Enhance Your Relationship With Your Partner
With the compassionate guidance and support of a marriage counseling specialist, you can develop the understanding and skills you need to foster a trusting and collaborative relationship with your partner. If you want to re-establish love, trust, and happiness with your spouse, or if you have additional questions about marriage counseling at our Rexburg office, please call Integrated Counseling and Wellness at 208-357-3104 or complete our online contact form to schedule a 15-minute consultation today.